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Normal Three-Year-Old Development

Parental and Caretaker Assessment Sheet




What's "normal" for a three-year-old? Parents/caretakers can observe the following behaviors - related to health, curiosity, play and more - preferably over a period of several weeks. Keep in mind that all 11 of these criteria of development should be examined in the light of the child's culture.

Behaviors to Assess Yes No Follow-up Information
Physical development and health 
Does the child usually fall asleep easily and wake up rested (with only occasional restless nights or nightmares)?
    Children this age usually experience "morning eagerness" if well rested. Frequent insomnia or morning grouchiness for 3 or 4 weeks or more may indicate the child is coping with excessive stress or is not getting enough sleep.
Eating habits
Does the child usually eat with a good appetite?
    Occasionally skipping meals or refusing certain foods is expected. Is the child distracted by the television or other activities during eating?
Toileting Habits
Does the child, on average over several weeks, exhibit bowel and bladder control? 
    Occasional accidents are normal, particularly with excessive intake of liquids, intestinal upset, or intense concentration on activities.
Curiosity
Does the child exhibit curiosity, adventure, even mischief?
    A child who does not exhibit curiosity may not be pushing against normal boundaries or may be excessively fearful. In contrast, constant snooping where forbidden or prying for information may indicate a search for boundaries and limits.
Interest
Does the child become involved in, absorbed, and interested in activities or projects outside of himself or herself (other than passive involvement with the TV)?
    A preschooler who cannot become absorbed in an activity or who rarely stays with a project until completion may need help attending to a task.
Variations in play
Does the child's play vary? Does the child add elements to playing, even with the same materials (using the same toys in a variety of ways)?
    A child who ritualistically and repetitively goes through the same sequence of play, with the same elements, in the same way, may be emotionally "stuck in neutral," indicating, perhaps, that the child is too insecure to "play with the environment." 
Range of emotions
Does the child display a range of emotions, such as affection, anger, enthusiasm, excitement, frustration, grief, joy, and love over a period of several weeks?
    A child whose emotions don't vary, or who is always angry, may be having some difficulty. Expressions of sadness are not necessarily a problem but may indicate the ability to really care about others (unless the sadness is prolonged). 
Friendship
Has the child initiated and maintained satisfying relationships with one or more peers?
    A child who is shy or excessively fearful of peers or who frequently claims superiority over others may be seeking reassurance or may doubt his or her ability to meet parents' high expectations. 
Spontaneous affection
Does the child express spontaneous affection and pleasure in being with one or more of those persons responsible for his or her care? Note: There is a cultural component to this question.
    Demonstrations of affection vary among families and cultures. In culturally appropriate ways, a thriving child is likely to express affection toward caretakers and deep pleasure in being with them. A thriving child is likely to spontaneously express affection.
Response to authority
Does the child usually respond well and accept adult authority most of the time—but not all the time?
    Occasional self-assertion, resistance, protest, and objections may indicate healthy socialization processes when followed by ultimate yielding to the adult. Unfailing acceptance of adult demands suggests excessive anxiety.
Enjoyment
Does the child enjoy playing with others, going to new places, seeing new things?
    If extreme shyness or strong dislikes prevent the child from enjoying new experiences in life, help may be called for.


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About this information: This material was adapted from an ERIC Digest by Katz, Lilian G. (October 1994). Assessing the Development of Preschoolers. Urbana, IL: ERIC Clearinghouse on Elementary and Early Childhood Education.

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